All these bills

One thing you can count on with a critical illness is a sudden influx of postal mail. You will get bills, statements and explanation of benefits. Some of the letters will be very very thick and when you go through them it will be eye opening. My oldest daughter was born with shoulder dystocia whenContinue reading “All these bills”

Waiting, waiting, waiting

I am not known for my patience, this is a virtue I do not possess. I have been known to hit send on an important email and call the recipient in that moment to see if they got it and what they thought about it. I have been known to send a package to someoneContinue reading “Waiting, waiting, waiting”

Blank Page Nerves

I have never liked to write. I have always preferred to be face to face when sharing information, not in writing. I was the kid in class given a 1000 word assignment and 950 words would be alright, the last 50 would be the word ‘very’ everywhere it could pass. Someone suggested years and yearsContinue reading “Blank Page Nerves”

Milestones

There are distinct periods in life, the change is often marked by a specific event, a milestone. My first six distinct periods are measured by which school I was in, the next 9 are about our kids and moves and jobs. We figured instead of measuring distinction in our lives based on our experiences, itContinue reading “Milestones”

Biopsy: husband view

Friday afternoon of Labor Day weekend we knew that Tuesday was going to be a biopsy. A breast biopsy. A biopsy is a procedure to take pieces of a tumor to determine if it is cancerous or not. That was a three day weekend. The longest and fastest three day weekend ever. Tuesday morning came.Continue reading “Biopsy: husband view”

Kindness matters

There are a lot of trips to the doctor to get to a cancer diagnosis, there are exponentially more after a cancer diagnosis. A lot seems like an understatement. My first trip to the Breast and GYN cancer center at Woman’s Hospital was by far the worst. I guess the reason for that is theContinue reading “Kindness matters”

Clearing your personal cache

Sometimes I get stuck with a thought. Really, really stuck. I never consider myself stuck if it is a good thought, only when they are not so good am I stuck. I really only know one way to get un-stuck, or get out of my own head, or really just to clear my cache, youContinue reading “Clearing your personal cache”

Waiting for last chemo

Chemotherapy is awful. Don’t get me wrong, I am cancer free today because of chemotherapy. I wouldn’t wish chemotherapy on anyone. I pray that chemotherapy becomes something less awful in my daughter’s lifetime and that they never ever need it because it is awful. Today I was reminded of the terrible time between the thirdContinue reading “Waiting for last chemo”

Play today pay tomorrow

Normal daily life. What exactly is normal daily life? I know it when I don’t have it, and don’t necessarily recognize it when I do. During chemo I prayed fervently that this would never become normal. During the normal times I know that I am nowhere near grateful enough. It takes longer for me toContinue reading “Play today pay tomorrow”

What you know

Ever felt like you didn’t know what you didn’t know? Or that you only knew enough to be dangerous? That is the feeling when you get a cancer diagnosis, amplified by a substantial bit. The big thing about all of this is that you don’t know a lot about the diagnosis, but you are theContinue reading “What you know”